Shahana Goswami has candidly spoken about her evolving views on love, open relationships, multiple partners and physical intimacy following her breakup with Milind Soman. During a recent conversation, the actress reflected on heartbreak, emotional freedom and unconventional relationship dynamics.
‘I was living the life I wanted to live’
Speaking about how long it took her to move on after heartbreak, Shahana told Siddharth Kannan, “In a sense, immediately, because I was living the life I wanted to live.”She added, “Immediately after that, I also at that time thought, ‘I don’t think relationships are for me because the formula of relationships doesn’t suit me.’”The actress then revealed that her understanding of relationships evolved over time. “We were in an open relationship where you do not put those rules but you are still rooted to each other,” she shared.
‘Why do we put everything into a contract?’
Explaining her philosophy on love and commitment, Shahana questioned society’s conventional approach to relationships.“If you trust life, then let life happen. Why do we put everything into a contract? If it has to happen, it will happen,” she said.The actor further added, “I have seen people who never got married but stayed together for 20-30 years. So if marriage is not necessary for love, then why should I bind myself?”According to Shahana, her definition of love gradually changed over the years. “To me, love is freedom more and more over a period of time. Whether it is friendship, parents or romantic relationships, you have to give people space to be who they are,” she said.“I don’t believe in control or rules being required in love,” she added.
‘I have many people with whom I share long-standing dynamics’
When asked her to define open relationships, Shahana stressed the importance of honesty and communication.“Open communication, honesty, constant clear communication. You have to truly understand what kind of person the other person is. Two people are never the same. You have to accept each other for who they are,” she explained.The actress also admitted that she no longer believes in the idea of having one “primary” partner.“At this point, I don’t even have one primary partner like that. I have many people with whom I have long-standing dynamics. But none of it is casual for me,” she said.Using friendships as an analogy, she elaborated, “Every friendship is different because every person is different. You focus only on the relationship you have with that person.”
Shahana Goswami on physical intimacy in open relationships
During the interaction, she was asked whether open relationships involve emotional and physical intimacy with multiple people.Responding candidly, Shahana said, “Sometimes it remains friendship, sometimes it can become physical too.”She further explained, “Maybe after three months with that person, you feel like physically connecting with them, and you do.”The actress also revealed that transparency is important in such dynamics. “There is nothing hidden in my life. They know if I was physically intimate with someone else. It’s not a reporting system, but yes, everybody knows,” she shared.
‘Heartbreak happens even in open relationships’
Shahana admitted that unconventional relationships are not free from emotional pain.“Of course heartbreak happens. If somebody says this setup doesn’t work for them anymore, your heart will break too. But that’s part of the experience,” she said.The actress also spoke about the emotional work required to sustain such relationships. “You have to deal with your jealousy, insecurities, loneliness and rejection. It’s not easy. People think freedom is easy, but you have to work a lot on yourself,” she added.
‘I have too much love to give’
Addressing criticism around her views on exclusivity, Shahana said many people misunderstand her perspective.“People think this choice comes from losing faith in love. But for me, it’s the opposite,” she explained.“I have too much love to give, so why should I give it to only one person?” she concluded.
